When it became clear two days ago that none of the other leadership contenders (not even media darling Rory Stewart) could block Boris Johnson's path to 10 Downing Street, establishment Remainers faced their worst nightmare: a future prime minister who might actually make Brexit happen - even with no deal.

Today, by purest coincidence, this 'exclusive' in The Guardian:

Police were called to the home of Boris Johnson and his partner, Carrie Symonds, in the early hours of Friday morning after neighbours heard a loud altercation involving screaming, shouting and banging.

The argument could be heard outside the property where the potential future prime minister is living with Symonds, a former Conservative party head of press.

A neighbour told the Guardian they heard a woman screaming followed by 'slamming and banging'. At one point Symonds could be heard telling Johnson to 'get off me' and 'get out of my flat'.

The neighbour said that after becoming concerned they knocked on the door but received no response. 'I [was] hoping that someone would answer the door and say "We're okay". I knocked three times and no one came to the door.'

The neighbour decided to call 999.

The Guardian's left-wing Remainer hacks don't actually say it, but the insinuation's clear enough: this man did something unpleasant to his soon-to-be wife.

Fabrication or exaggeration, it hardly matters; in the current year, that's enough to bring down a career.

Would the establishment really stoop to a low, dirty trick to get their way?

If you need to ask, then you haven't been paying attention these past three years.